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Pilot Gallery Transcript


[garbage truck pullup]

[alarm sound]

🎵 Wake up time 5:49 feeling fine, cause it's 5:49! 🎵

[music stops]

Onion: 5:49? Why are we up at 5:49?

Apple: Oh, because it had to rhyme with wake up time, for the song.

Onion: What's wrong with 8:49?

[Apple tests song quickly]

Apple: Yeah, true. We could've done 8:49...

Onion: UGGH AHH!

[cars and snoring]

[Title screen]

[Computer noise]

Apple: UGH! [overlapping] I really got to stop putting this thing so loud!

Onion: True...what is it?

Apple: It's an invite, to Hotdog's party...tonight!!

Onion: But we never get invited to parties...

Apple: Well we did this time!

Hotdog: Hey, do you know how to uninvite people?

Burger: Maybe. Yeah, why?

Hotdog: I accidentally invited these two guys, Apple and Onion.

Burger: Here, let me see... I think there's a setting where you can just take them off the list. Hopefully they haven't seen it yet!

Onion: I printed out the invite so we know exactly where to go!

[down key is pressed]

Apple: Who else is going?

Onion: [gasps] French Fry!

Apple: Haha! You love French Fry don't you Onion!

Onion: Yeah!

Apple: But she's a girl!

Onion: I know but I just love her! It's not my fault!

Apple: Pfft! Haha! Why don't you ask her out at the party?

Onion: And then we can hang around together! Accept invitation!

[computer sound]

Apple: That's weird.

[computer sound]

Apple: It won't let me back in.

[computer sound] [computer sound] [computer sound] [computer sound] [computer sound] [computer sound]

Apple: Luckily we've printed out all the details.

Apple: Now let's go practice our dance moves.

[Apple and Onion practice their dancing on the sidewalk]

Apple: Onion!

Onion: Yeah?

Apple: I think if we're really gonna get French Fry's attention at the party, we'll need to stand out more.

[more...]

Onion: What do you propose?

[A jingle plays]

French fry: Hi apple and onion

Onion:[gasps] Hi french fry

[Apple laughs.]

Hamburger: Now where have I seen [gasps] I think there's a setting where you can take them off the list.

French fry:I´m so excited for-

Apple:For hotdog`s party. Yeah we are too. What?

Onion: I don´t think hambuger wanted french fry to mention

Apple: to mention what

Onion: hotdog´s party

Hambuger: No it not like that it´s just because this party it´s not going to be the type with ballons and stuff. You know what I mean.

Apple:I don't

Hamburger:this party is going to be more More Grown up.

Onion: We can´t go to this party

Apple: but what about asking french fry out

Onion: We act like little kids!

Apple:But so do I. Onion We´re going to grow up.

Onion:We´re glad we sold all our old clothes are´nt we apple.

Apple: Yeah cause we have money. Cash money. Now all we have to do is open up a bank account

Onion: Then do you think we will be grown up?

Apple : I just know if we do it we will

Onion: I think this plan will work

Apple: We´re already doing it baby

Both: Yes. Yes. Yes Yes. Yes. Yes.

Apple: This is´nt very grown up is it?

An elderly person: No

Apple: Ok grown ups.

Both:Grown ups. Grown ups. Grown ups. Grown ups. Grown ups! Grown ups ! Grown ups!

Apple: This is it.

A person: Hey

[They argue for bit]

Apple: That´s not a hold up. This is a hold up!

The bank teller: What did you say?

Apple: I said this is a hold up. Oh.

[They get sent to jail]

Apple: ugh jail.

Both:[They both scream]

Beige:Oh no. Don´t be scare

Apple: OK.

Beige: Uh this is my friend mittens. They didn´t let me bring him to jail, so I got him tattooed on me.

Miitten: Hello I´m mittens.

Apple: We´re apple and onion.

Mitten: Nice to meet you.

Beige: I´m sorry to ask but how did you two cute people go to jail?

Apple: We wanted to be grown up to ask french fry out.

Beige:French fry huh.So why can´t you go to the party.

Apple:We just don´t know how to be grown up.

Beige:Guys I´m going to tell you a story. There was once a guy who was a pushover. He wanted to be tough. Then he saw the toughest guys around. And you know what he did?

Apple:No.

Beige: He copied them and no one pushed hum around again.

Apple: Was the guy you?\

Beige:Yeah

Onion:And that´s why you scared us

Beige: Yeah. Sorry. SO if you want to grow up. Go to that party and start copying people.

Apple:Thanks beef jerky.

Beige: Call me beige baby.

Beige: Don´t forget to copy.

Both:Bye beige.

Beige: I´ll miss you

Burger: Hello sorry about early come on in.

Hot dog: French fry is a little late but she will be coming. She says your really funny.

Both: ¨She says your really funny.¨

Burger:Oh I see I get it now.

Both:¨Oh I see I get it now.¨

Burger:Hey that´s not how I- Is that how I sound?

Both:¨Hey that´s not how I- Is that how I sound?¨

Burger:STOP IT.

Both¨STOP IT.¨

[The three hyperventilate.]

Burger:I´m gonna go.

Apple:This doesn´t feel right

Onion:I love her apple

Apple: Ok you copy the people over there and I´ll copy the other people. By the time french fry comes we´ll be ready.

A person:Look I´m having a baby.

A person: Ooh the baby looks so cute.

Onion:Let me see it looks so OOh and that so OOh babies.

[The person blushes.]

Popcorn: Hello I´m ppppopcorn

Apple: The pppleaseures all mmmmine.

[Popcorn blushes]

A girl with milkshake:Oh milkshake this view is so romantic.

Apple: Yeah look at this brick. It´s like all my dreams are coming true now.

A police man: Huh Beige where are the others.

Beige: leave me alone !

The police man: Hot dog´s party.

French fry: Wow hot dog I´m going to polish this off in 20 seconds.

Apple:(whispering) Copy.

Onion:Yeah French fry I´ll probably polish this off in 10 seconds.

French fry: Well I´m so hungry I could eat my plate then yours.

Onion:Yeah We´re so hungry we could eat our plate your plate and every one else´s. can´t we apple?

Apple: Yeah.

[they start eating everyone´s plate crazily]

Onion:I´m gonna do it.

Apple: Yes. Yes Onion.

Onion: French fry will you will you will you be my-

The police: Stop nobody move.

[screaming]

The police: Where apple and onion. Where´s the other one.

Apple:He escaped.

The police: You´re going back to jail.

French fry: Wait why were you in jail?

Apple: We tried to be grown up and we accidentally held up a bank. Then we copied people in order to be grown up.

French fry: Why didn´t you come as you are.

Apple: Because we act like kids.

French fry: So what that´s why we became friends in the first place. Don´t you remember?

Apple: I do.

Onion: As do I. We´re sorry we ruined the party how can we make it up to you.

[dun dun dun dun dun dun da.]

Both: Bye guys.

The police: Hey weren´t we suppose to arrest those guys.

Both:Dear beige Today we learned should just be ourselves and we think you should just be yourself because your a really nice guy. Your friends Apple and Onion.

[Beige puts the page on his tattoo]